let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
