you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Randomize
