their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
