One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize