i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
