You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
