Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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