Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
someone get that fucking seahorse.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
