'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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