come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
