We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize