She's JV to your varsity
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I wear drunk well.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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