Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize