I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize