Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
