so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
