FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
