No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize