Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I look better un-naked...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Randomize
