This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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