Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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