Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
