the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
