Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
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Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
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I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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