Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
