I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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