but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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