Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
