you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
did i just pee glitter
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
