PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
