all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
there is glitter all over my balls
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