I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
