You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize