Kiss
Puke
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
