Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
