My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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