I think i peed on brittanys purse
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
