You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize