i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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