yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
