i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
