I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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