I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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