david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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