normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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