Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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