Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
