so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We need to get me chipped asap
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
