Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
