he thought i was a dude.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
