I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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